Being an adult is way cooler when you're a kid.

I'm having one of those, "Once upon a time, I grew up and became an adult and it sucks" kind of days. It probably has a lot to do with the fact that I have sixty-three days to find a new apartment in my price range, or find a new full time job that puts apartments in my price range. Tricky stuff. I also read that if you make lists on your blog more people read it. I think that's weird, but I'll do it because, procrastination. The Top Twenty #TypicalTwentysomething Things that Are My Life Right Now:

1. My college degree is what I pay for, not what I want to do.

2. I'm ALWAYS looking for a job. Like, always. Even when I just got a new job, which I just did. I'm looking for a new job because while I like my 3 titles (Nanny, Rec Therapist, Babysitter for the greater Nashville area), lately my dreams have been things like walking out of work at 5:30 every day, having weekends on Saturdays and Sundays with the rest of the human race instead of Monday's and some Thursdays, and having a bank account that has more than seven dollars in it. #dreamer

3. My apartment is a sad, sad place. My closet door routinely falls off of the wall, the outlets don't work, our sink is typically broken, when we moved in we didn't have cold water, our neighbor has chickens as pets, our kitchen doubles as the master closet,  we think our upstairs neighbors bowl down their hallways, you can have a conversation with someone inside in normal quiet voices from outside, it's super druggy, but rent was $297 y'all!!!

4. I really want a cat and I want to name it Glen.

5. So. Much. Debt.

6. 98% of my mail is credit card offers. I average 8-12 offers a week and out of those 6 are addressed to MR. Jordan

7. I probably drink more wine than milk, but I'm not really upset about this one.

8. I love #hashtags but the ones that describe my life are upsetting, #MyFictionalCatWouldJudgeMe #AllMyYogaPantsAreDirty #CrumbsInMyBed #YupStillPoor #OutOfWine #NetflixIsMyBoyfriend #WhatsABudget #Wat

9. My Christmas tree is still up

10. My friends are amazing, no really. They are. They, along with my family, make life so much fun. I love that I have such strong friendships all over the country from elementary school, college, and now here in Nashville

11. My best joke is my bank account

12.  "Should I buy groceries this week...... or have a social life?" Social life typically wins because so what if you can't eat meat this month because you went to a movie and drove all over God's green earth because the ghetto you live in is forever away from everyone, friends are fun!

13. The grass is always greener when you're still on your parents insurance plan. (Thanks, Buzzfeed Modern Proverbs)

14. I can't count all the times I stop and look around and think, "what am I even doing right now? Is my life buffering?"

15.  Maturity is a myth. At no point does getting up early and putting on pants become enjoyable.

16. I remember sitting in study hall when I was 16 and deciding with my friends that 23 is the perfect age to get married and have your first kid. Truth is, the only commitment I'm fully comfortable with is my Netflix subscription.

17. I'm really upset that my mom was right about everything.

18. I'm realizing that your 20's aren't so much about the "magical time of finding yourself" (what? Stop, ew) but more about crossing off all the things you now realize are pretty awful.

19. My guacamole stained tax forms sat on my desk for three weeks before I mailed them in, but you better believe I've done every Buzzfeed quiz known to man. What annoying type of "House Hunters" person am I? I DON'T EVEN WATCH HOUSE HUNTERS. And I'm the type with no real opinion.

20. Even though I complain and everything I say is dripping with sarcasm, if life weren't so crazy I'd be really bored. I'm #blessed with this adventure I've been given and can't wait to see what the next seven years of this absurd decade brings me.